The decision to enter into a prenuptial agreement is an important step for any couple. How do you explain to your partner that it is meant to protect the interests of each family member? How to avoid quarrels and accusations of selfishness and mistrust? Let’s try to understand these questions together.
Prepare for the conversation
Before you decide to enter into a prenuptial agreement, you need to properly prepare and prepare your partner to talk about this topic. A few recommendations you should follow:
- You should research the issue yourself: understand what a prenuptial agreement can and cannot do when you can enter into an agreement, and what it can protect you from.
- Figure out if there are risks for you and your family without a prenuptial agreement.
- Understand what benefits the agreement gives your half – to better argue your position (this is an important question, this is how you’ll hook your partner’s interest in the topic).
- Under no circumstances should you start a direct conversation about a prenuptial agreement.
How to Start the Conversation Right
You’ll need foreplay for this delicate conversation. Find a topic that intersects with the issue and yet is interesting to your half. Likes the news – tell the news about a scandalous divorce: social chronicles and noisy trials about famous entrepreneurs and public figures will help in this. Likes movies – watch a movie on the subject. Loves to travel – tell about the marriage contracts of the country where you’re going on vacation like Monaco, and so on. Show some imagination!
Perhaps after such preparation, your half will start discussing topics related to the marriage contract herself, and here you can carefully talk about the possible benefits of the contract for her. If not, simply outline the benefits to your spouse in the conversation, but using someone else as an example. And now that the seed has sprouted, it’s time to talk about the risks of your family living without a prenuptial agreement.
Only after you have done the preliminary work and prepared your partner for this topic, you can already move on to discuss specifically your prenuptial agreement – but only if you understand that your partner is ready to discuss it. If such a willingness is not observed, then go through the preparatory phase first.
When to start talking about a prenuptial agreement
– On the eve of marriage.
Right now, you’re in love and don’t have any jointly acquired property, so talking about a prenuptial agreement usually goes easily and quietly – in fact, you only share dreams and plans for now. And if there is any tension, doubts, and fears within the couple, isn’t it better to resolve them before committing your life to someone else?
– During the marriage, when there is no property yet.
A prenuptial agreement won’t have to describe any specific items and figures, which will make the conversation casual. In addition, it will no longer be possible to manipulate the phrase, “That’s it, you don’t want to sign the papers, I won’t marry you!” Divorce because of the prenuptial agreement is not very sensible.
– During the marriage, when you already have property.
Here it all depends on the conditions you want to put – so the arguments for the distribution of this property between the spouses must be carefully prepared. And this is where the advice of a good lawyer really comes in handy.
– Before the dissolution of the marriage.
If you decided to dissolve the marriage in a civilized manner, divide the property by mutual agreement, without the courts, the conclusion of the marriage contract will help in this. In this case, you will preserve more or less good relations and do not spend as much money on lawyers, as in the case of litigation.